


My Kind Of Wo(man)

by hawkinsheart (orphan_account)



Series: My Kind Of Wo(man) [1]
Category: Anastasia (1997), Cinderella (1950), Treasure Planet (2002)
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Anxiety Disorder, Everyone Is Gay, Fluff, Gay, Gay Male Character, Heavy Angst, M/M, Shitty attempt at being poetic, Wet Dream, dimitri is a flirt, jim is crying mentally, jim is gay and can’t figure out how to cope
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-18
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-16 13:42:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28832127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/hawkinsheart
Summary: Jim has dreams about a certain guy. Anxiety begins to bubble in his stomach and pain takes over as he watches his dream guy fall for Anastasia. The dreams evolve, and Jim just can’t take it. So, he begins writing anonymous letters to Dimitri. Jim thinks he’s sunk to the bottom. God, he’s stupid.(DISCONTINUED. I GAVE UP IF ANYONE WANTS TO CONTINUE WRITING THIS THEN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT TO IT IDC)
Relationships: Anastasia/Cinderella, Dimitri | Dmitry (Anastasia 1997 & Broadway)/Jim Hawkins
Series: My Kind Of Wo(man) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2117229
Comments: 12
Kudos: 15





	1. My Kind Of Heartbreak

**Author's Note:**

> I literally can’t sleep so I might just have this as a one time thing. I got pissed with Wattpad because they have NO Jim x Dimitri content so I’m shifting more towards AO3 now. Anyways, Jim has problems like mine specifically, sorry if he is out of character. Also ANGST PROLLY NO HAPPY ENDING BC I LOVE TORTURING MYSELF

Jim sat there, staring at the rose that began to bend over with lack of interest. Anastasia, some girl Dimitri had become friends with, gifted the man with the flower. It started to wither along with Jim. But still, he hated it with every fiber of his being, regardless if it was a bit relatable. He wished and hoped on shooting stars and gleaming fire balls in the sky that Dimitri wouldn’t become a royal snob like the rest of the Romanov family but, once that Anastasia girl came along, she changed that with a snap of her fingers. Dimitri was more distant from Jim, who he had known since they were children, and became more demanding of lower people in his control. 

Do this and do that was heard from Dimitri often. Jim wanted nothing more than to K.O Anastasia and slap the newfound brat attitude out Dimitri. Of course, he couldn’t do this. So, Jim settled with ranting to his little best friend, Morph every night before bed. Sometimes, if he was still shaken, he would rant while he supposed to act like he had a healthy sleep schedule. Morph would chirp in agreement and get angry along with Jim, but the tiny creature looked cuter when mad. Big, baby like eyes all furrowed with a gleam of light in them. It made Jim happier when he was finished. 

Each day was a drag and slugged around the clock like a snail. And, Anastasia and Dimitri flirting was not a nice sight for Jim, it made the day worse. First, it started out as a feeling of frustration, jealously, and anger. But, it began to bubble into dread, depression, and fatigue. It wasn’t long until Jim sobbed his heart out at night instead of ranting to the pink blob. Morph would rub against Jim’s cheek and sound noises of worry and sadness each night. It was all the same, it was just a routine. 

Now, it was Jim’s turn to be distant. He no longer tried to spark short exchanges with Dimitri anymore. Instead, he ignored the man every time they passed by each other. It didn’t mean anything to Dimitri, the Russian paid no mind, probably lost in his own thoughts about Anastasia. Sometimes, Dimitri would softly smile and Jim yearned for the possibility that in some other universe, Dimitri was smiling lovingly about him, not the Russian woman. 

That added onto the list of why Jim should cry so hard that he sleeps hours close to being coma like. 

The feeling was oppressive. It struck in his stomach like lighting and bloomed to his heart like thunder. He could feel every twist and turn of his guts, every knot tied within, and every tingle that flooded his senses like a tsunami. He clutched the skin of where his heart was, creating red lines of nail marks. He sobbed pathetically and heaved his chest up and down with pants louder than massive waves slapping shores following along. It hurt so much. 

Love hurt so much and Jim wanted to abolish the feeling. He craved to wipe the sensation off the universe. Well, only a certain type of love. He yearned for his mother in these deep and dark nights. He just wanted to feel her always warm skin hug him as her cheek pressed up against his own. He wanted to hear the sound of his mother mumbling sweet nothings as she kissed his forehead and rubbed circles into his back. He wanted his mother’s love knowing he was never going to get Dimitri’s. 

He wanted the Benbow Inn again. It was burnt down, though. Partially the reason why Jim was back at the palace. From a young age, Jim was always at the palace, helping his new father figure John Silver out with his work as the cook. That’s how he met Dimitri. The older little boy came up to Jim one day as the younger boy was exploring the halls. This time, he meant to be alone because it was always Silver that would join him on these walks while the cook was on break. Little Dimitri popped his head in from one corner and slowly approached Jim. Only, Jim didn’t know Dimitri was behind him. 

So, when Dimitri spoke up a single “hello,” Jim jumped quickly and snapped around. And then from there, they just played with each other. Some days were hide and seek, others were drawing mischievously on the walls. That was little rebel Jim’s idea. It took awhile to convince Dimitri, though. 

Jim was here to make money, he realized again. He wasn’t here to reunite with Dimitri who has long forgot him and doesn’t need him anymore. The brunette was here to help his mother and him, to replace the inn and get back to normal life. Normal didn’t need to have Dimitri in the equation. Normal could just be keeping the things in the past, in the past. 

Jim didn’t stick to that for very long. He did his work in the kitchen, all by himself leaving him alone to think out loud. Morph was always with him but the tiny creature couldn’t really speak or judge Jim. And that was perfect for the teen. 

“Morph...” Jim said. The pink blob floated over to him quickly, smiling brightly at his owner. The boy smiled back but it melted into frustration again. “I just can’t believe I’m so stupid!” He raised his voice a bit. “Did I really think he would love me? We’re not 6 anymore and haven’t been for a while. I’m nineteen!” He slammed a pot into the sink and continued to season the meat. “I’m grown, he’s grown, we have our own lives! But...” Jim trailed off slowly and softly. “I’m just sad he let go of me so easily, all because some girl he met in Paris. She looks ginger! Gingers are weird!” 

“Gingers weird!” Morph repeated in agreement. Jim bursted into laughter. He raised his hand to pet Morph. 

“You’re so cute, Morph. And on top of that, I love you. Thank you, for everything,” Jim rubbed the blob’s head. He chirped then rubbed his body against Jim’s cheek as a thank you of his own. Jim finished up with the food and put it on serving plates. He began to advance to Dimitri’s bedroom. 

He stood outside the door once he was there. Jim gazed at the bottom of the door sadly, watching the shadows from the other side move with giggles and chatter acting as music. He didn’t really want the food to get cold, but whatever, right? Dimitri didn’t care so why should Jim? He should’ve just undercooked the meat and seasoned it with only salt. He should’ve left the vegetables raw with no seasoning at all! But, his mind raced to his mother. They needed money. Their future relied on him, so Jim swallows down his depression and knocked briefly on the door. 

He was met with the immediate swing of the door being opened with a smiling Dimitri there. Jim’s eyes widened as he quickly studied the other man’s beauty. A smile looked great on the Russian, but he was smiling because of Anastasia. Jim didn’t think the smile looked so pleasant now. 

“Um, your uh, food...” he stuttered and offered the two plates. Dimitri took the pieces of china into his own hands and beamed at the brunette. 

“Thank you!” He practically shouted. Jim flinched but snapped back into being ‘normal.’ He nodded. 

“You’re welcome,” Jim took a step to leave but Dimitri spoke up. 

“I’d like to catch you later, Jim. I want to talk to you.” 

The proposal seemed innocent, because it was, but Jim still tensed up and allowed his thoughts to race to uncanny answers and his anxiety to buzz around. The teen turned to the older man, nodded again as the only response Jim could do without either confessing his love or acting like a total idiot. 

He walked away once Dimitri was done with him.


	2. My Kind Of Letters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim writes a letter to his mother and John Silver. However, the teen begins to become great friends with Anastasia, creating a bigger problem. How could Jim dislike her because of her closeness with Dimitri when she’s so nice? Jim begins to ponder an idea to cope with his feelings and Morph worries for his human.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I lied. I might add a good ending but I’ll see how it goes. I’m trying everything I can to do my baby Jim justice 😔✊

Jim’s legs shook as he gripped onto the kitchen island. He gaped at the floor and let shivers run up his spine. Morph chirped in worry as he watched Jim whisper anxiously to himself. 

“Jim!” Morph squeaked. Morph had done this before, but not very often. The brunette turned towards the blob in disbelief. He had a wide and long smile playing at his lips. 

“Morph!” Jim scoffed. “Morph you said my name! What is that!? Like, the second time since 2 years ago? Morph!” The pink creature smiled cheekily at the praises, but his face quickly melted back into worry. He rubbed his body against Jim’s face affectionately, watching his owner’s expression while doing so. “Thanks, Morph. Hey, how ‘bout we write to mom when we’re done, yeah?” Morph nodded fiercely at the offer. “Yeah,” Jim smiled, “let’s do that.” 

Both of them finished up with the dishes after making a small meal for themselves. Morph sucked his food down faster than normal, probably excited to write to his new ‘mom.’ Morph and Jim were like brothers now, regardless if they had a huge difference in species. Sarah adored Morph just like everyone else so, why should it matter? 

They rushed up the stairs and headed towards their room. 

“What are you doing?” The girl’s voice rang through the empty hallway before Jim could finish the corner. He turned around quickly and stood up tall. Anastasia studied the teen with an expression Jim couldn’t place. 

“Well, it’s my break, ma’am.” 

“Huh, didn’t Dimitri want to talk to you?” She returned to normal and casually brought up Jim’s new problem: facing Dimitri after ignoring him this entire time. Jim nodded instead. 

“Yes, he did. I’m waiting for him to just come up to me when he’s ready. Right now, I was heading to my room to write a letter with Morph,” the pink and drop like being flew out of Jim’s sleeve and presented himself to Anastasia proudly. The ginger giggled. 

“Cute thing you got there,” she commented. 

“Yeah, thanks. He’s something,” he replied as Morph played around Jim, making the boy look every which way. “Morph!” He laughed playfully. The creature continued, giggling along. 

“Who are you writing to?” She asked innocently as she approached the pair. 

“My mom and this guy who’s like my father, Silver. Maybe even Doppler and Amelia. Pretty sure they got married without me and now Amelia is pregnant! Man, I wish I was there...” Jim indulged into his thoughts. Anastasia began to walk beside the teen while listening quietly to him. “I wonder how Silver’s doing. He was supposed to get his arm repaired after falling off a ladder while trying to put up a sign for our inn. I hope that thing is pretty close to being done,” he rambled on. 

“What happened to it?” Anastasia asked curiously. 

“Oh, it burnt down after some pirates raided it. I was on this journey to Treasure Planet. That’s how I met Doppler, Amelia, and this other guy...”

“Me!” Morph squeaked. 

“And you, how could I forget you, Morphy?” Jim played around with the nickname. The Russian woman smiled fondly at the duo as she watched. 

“Did you guys ever get to the planet?” She questioned again as they entered Jim’s room. The teen nodded with a wide smile. 

“Oh yeah, we got there alright. It was really intense and stuff and at the last minute, I pressed the map and took us to Treasure Planet with a whole planet was blowing up behind us!” Jim told. Morph shifted into the scene that Jim was describing, showing Anastasia what Jim was talking about. The woman gaped at the illustration. 

“Really?!” She interjected. The brunette nodded fiercely. 

“And Silver ended up being evil but he saved me multiple times and gave me the treasure he could manage since the planet was like booby trapped. It started to crumple once we took anything,” Jim reached into his pants and pulled out a ring with a diamond shining a gleaming blue. Anastasia studied the jewel with fascination. “This and Morph is what I have Silver while I’m gone. And my necklace,” he held it gently in his hands, “is what I have of mom.” He opened the locket to reveal a picture of baby Jim smiling widely with his mother as he attempted to kiss her cheek. The ginger beamed at the picture. 

“She’s beautiful,” Anastasia commented. “I can see where you get your looks.” 

“Thanks...” Jim’s guts twisted internally. Maybe, Anastasia wasn’t as bad as he thought. Maybe, he was just jealous of a sweet girl who deserved sweet things. The teen turned to his desk and pulled out a letter, ink, quill, and put some wax and a stamp to the side for later. Morph swiftly returned to Jim’s side after affectionately massaging the ginger’s cheek. She walked up behind Jim and watched as he neatly wrote, ‘Dear Mom.’ 

“Morph, what do you wanna say?” He asked his friend. 

“Cake! Cake! Hi! Love!” He chirped happily. He had learned new words and had a new favorite food which was specifically strawberry cake with loads of whipped cream. Jim giggled at his pet and jotted the words down. 

“Cake, cake, hi, love,” Jim mumbled slowly as he wrote. Anastasia watched with wonder.

“You really let Morph say whatever he wants?” She asked. Jim nodded at her question. 

“Mom knows it’s Morph and a few letters ago, she told me how cute she thought it was to read Morph’s thoughts. Kind of became a habit, y’know?” 

Anastasia bobbed her head. “Cant blame her. This guy is very cute,” she mimicked a higher voice like she was talking to a dog. Morph grinned ear to ear (though he didn’t have any ears) at the new attitude. 

“Anything else, Morph?” 

“Miss...” the blob sat silent for a second while he thought, “Silver! Miss Silver!” 

“You miss Silver?” Anastasia wondered. Morph nodded quickly. 

“I miss him too, Morphy...” Jim continued to write. Once he finished the letter, he tucked the paper into the envelope and stamped it closed. He jotted the address and name down and tucked it away for later mailing. 

Both humans chatted for a while, walking down halls and turning every which corner in gardens and ball rooms. Weirdly enough, Jim thought the palace was more alive empty. Nothing was distracting anything from the beauty of the building. The brunette soaked every corner and pillar and staircase into his mind as they ventured on. 

Anastasia would talk about her love for her grandmother (thankfully she never mentioned Dimitri), or about how beautiful and elegant Paris was, and about her dog, Pooka. Jim would ramble on about his adventure to Treasure Planet some more for Anastasia’s sake, Silver and his childhood (he didn’t talk about his father, though), also about how he missed the inn desperately. 

Both people listened to each other intently, asking a few questions here and there that only deepened the conversation. At one point, Jim had to get back to work but Anastasia still followed and talked with him. She even learned a thing or two about cooking that Silver had taught the teen. She helped with seasoning and cooking the meat briefly. 

Jim continued to ask himself internally how he began to dislike her. Anastasia was so sweet, thoughtful, and honest. She listened and could speak and judge, something Jim didn’t think he needed. But, he did and it let him flush out all his feelings. A little bit, that was. None of them mentioned Dimitri and Jim didn’t mention his father. Those two things were bigger problems only his mother, Silver, and Morph can know about. 

Jim served dinner to Dimitri and Anastasia once the Russian man came back from running errands and catching up with some friends. Jim and Anastasia were so deep into talking, they hadn’t noticed that Dimitri was gone for most of the day. 

The brunette arrived to the big table and placed each respected plates in front of the pair. Anastasia smiled fondly at the boy and Dimitri did the same. Jim was about to turn around to exit but Anastasia spoke up.

“Hey, Jim. Why don’t you have dinner with us?” She offered. Jim froze in place. 

“Um, I haven’t made my own dinner yet.” 

“That’s okay, you can share with me!” She proposed. “I probably can’t eat this all by myself. Plus, I wanna hear more about Amelia and your other friends. Amelia sounds like an intimidating lady but a fascinating one nonetheless!”

“I mean if...”

“I don’t mind! I’ve been meaning to catch up with you anyways, Jim,” Dimitri added. Jim blushed a deep shade of red but decided to listen to the girl. He took a seat next to her and watched as she grabbed another bowl from the china cabinet in the corner of the large room.

“Anya...” Dimitri spoke up. 

“It’s a bowl, bowls are meant to be used. No problem in using it for why it was made in the first place,” she proposed confidently and sat it in front of Jim. The boy looked at it with amazement. 

“Anastasia...”

“We’re close enough now Jim! Just call me Anya!” She ignored the men’s attention to the china and started to divide her food up and put it in her new found friend’s bowl.

Both men eventually got over Anya giving Jim a china bowl and they started to talk. Jim didn’t really add anything, though. He was kind of anxious to talk around Dimitri, and Anya smiled at him with a hint of something in her eyes. Jim shivered, and was haunted by the look at night. 

He laid in his bed, staring at the ceiling with his mind racing and buzzing about Anya’s expression at dinner. 

She just looked so informed, so aware, like she could just shove a hand into Jim’s chest and read his heart and thoughts. But, the look wasn’t mean or mischievous. It wasn’t a face that said, “don’t touch my man, don’t even think about it.” It was more of a, “oh honey, your poor brain, I know everything that’s going on in there.” Jim shivered again and punched his pillow. 

“Stupid!” He shouted as he threw another punch. Morph got up from his sleeping place, which was Jim’s jacket pocket, and flew to his owner’s side. He chattered nervously and raced his eyes around for a solution. He threw his body straight into Jim’s face with no second thought. The teen’s vision was blinded. He scratched at his face and pulled Morph away. 

“Morph!” The organism tweeted some more. Jim’s face softened. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to yell. I’m just so...lost,” he mumbled as he let go of the pink drop. Morph landed on the brunette’s shoulder and watched and listened. “She’s so hard to read! Like, she might know! I don’t know...” the boy sighed in defeat. “I just don’t want that to ruin the little friendship I have with Dimitri. I don’t want to live the rest of my life knowing I grossed out my childhood crush.” 

The both of them stayed silent for a while. What was to say? To think? What if Anya did know? Would he have to run away? Never talk to Dimitri or Anya, fake his death? No, not that far but considering they’re royalty, they could just seek him out whenever they chose. It was scary thinking about the amount of power they had, not just alone but also combined. Jim, the peasant boy he was, was nothing compared to them. He was an ant under their shoes. Swerving every which way to avoid being stepped on.

Anya was like that kid who was too kind to think about stepping on an ant but, as she got older, maybe she thought about stepping on them. It was a gamble, fuck up, fucked over. That was the gamble’s rule. 

But, what if Jim could do something? Let all the feelings gush out? He could write, like anyone else. So, why not use it? 

Scented letters, Jim shoved the idea in his head. ‘Get scented letters tomorrow.’


	3. My Kind Of Signature

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim meets a new friend at an author shop and finally approaches his idea of writing to Dimitri but, the teen has a problem. Anya begins to act weird.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I accidentally refreshed the page when trying to open a new tab to look up a synonym for this word so I’m sorry if the end seems rushed I was really sad and angry. I hope this chapter wasn’t too boring or bad

Jim rushed out the doors of the palace quickly once the clock hand turned 2 o’clock. Morph zipped behind his owner, making noises of complaint as he went along. The teen ignored Morph without even intending to do so and continued his journey to the author store. Jim studied the dark and royal architecture of the store once he arrived but, only briefly. He sped walked in, dismissing the uncomfortable feeling that bubbled in his chins. 

The worker there smiled brightly at the new customer and made her way towards the brunette. “Is there anything specific you’re looking for, young man?” She clapped her hands together softly, still beaming radiantly. Clearly, the lady loved her job or was really good at acting like an overly optimistic person. 

“Letter scents,” his face softened as he snapped back to reality. The employee grinned ear to ear at this answer. 

“A special person?” She asked as she lead the two of them towards the back of the store. Jim nodded with a mighty blush. 

“Yeah, I guess. It’s stupid, I probably shouldn’t have thought about this,” Jim’s chest bloomed in anxiety as he mumbled the last bit to himself. Clearly, it wasn’t low enough. 

“It’s not stupid,” the lady replied. “Whoever you’re going to send the letters to, they are going to love it! They always do for I see the customers with the most heart always come in requesting the very same thing as you.” 

“I don’t believe that for a second.”

“Oh, you’d be surprised at how a little detail like smell to a letter could start relationships, or even fix them,” she prompted. The woman was maybe the same age as Jim. She had flowing blonde hair that had a headband pulling some desired hair strands back. She had the most gleaming blue eyes ever, instantly reminding Jim of the diamond ring Silver had gifted him. “I’m Cinderella, by the way.” 

“I’m Jim-“ 

“I know that already, silly,” Cinderella laughed lightly. “Seriously, Dimitri will not shut up about you.” 

Jim blushed darkly while blinking confusedly. 

“Okay, I really don’t believe that,” he mumbled. Cinderella looked at him with sympathy. 

“It’s for him, isn’t it?” She asked quietly. Jim nodded sadly. “He’ll love it, for sure.” 

“It don’t think he cares for me, even if you say he talks about me often,” Jim added. Cinderella’s face squished into more sadness. 

“I recommend the poppy scent,” she grabbed the tiny flask and handed it to the teen. “He likes poppy.” 

Jim took the flask from the employee and smiled roughly. Maybe, this might not go as well as Jim thought. But, it seemed like Cinderella was his only fan, cheering him on with all her heart. It was nice to hear and see, getting some support from a person who understands, but Jim was sensitive. 

“I hope it works...”

“It will, Jim. It will. She isn’t what you think,” she smiled sweetly and guided Jim to the register. Jim paid for his things and stuffed the flask deep into his pant pocket once he was out the store. He patted his pocket to see if the bottle wasn’t easy to see and began walking again when he thought it was good enough. The palace came into view again, and Jim studied it to see Dimitri at the steps, holding something between his fingers. As the brunette got closer, he realized Dimitri was smoking a cigarette. He held his breath silently as the smoke pierced his lungs. 

“Hi, Dimitri,” Jim spoke up. The Russian beamed at the teen genuinely. 

“Hey, how are you doing?” He asked as he put out the cigarette. Jim shrugged as he watched carefully.

“I’m just tired, like usual, I guess,” he mumbled. Dimitri nodded and began to walk inside. Jim trailed beside him as the conversation continued. 

“I understand. Things are going to get worse, unfortunately. Anya’s grandmother is supposed to come by in a few days. I guess to check up on her or whatever,” Dimitri’s mood shifted subtly as he spoke. Jim cocked a brow. 

“Do you not like her grandma?” Dimitri shook his head. 

“She’s stubborn in all the wrong ways. She just won’t take no for an answer, everything must go her way. Not to mention her status only boosts her snobby attitude,” Dimitri commented. “You listen here young man, what I say, goes. I’m in charge,” he mocked rudely. Jim chuckled lightly. 

“Sounds pretty close,” he said. The Russian smiled fondly at him, a light flush to his cheeks. Jim snapped his head to the other side to pretend he was looking at something else. He wasn’t very good at hiding his blush. As his eyes wandered some more, he saw Anya. She stared at him with a sort of fascination in her eyes. Jim felt confused. 

He waved at her and watched as she waved back happily. A giant grin spread across her face but, it wasn’t malicious. It seemed like Anya was really happy that Jim was talking with Dimitri. Why? Jim couldn’t figure it out. 

“Jim?” The boy turned back to the taller man. 

“Yeah?” He asked obliviously. 

“I said, do you need any help in the kitchen?” 

“Oh, no! I’ll be fine,” Jim said. Dimitri smirked. 

“Really? ‘Cuz I’m getting awfully bored and when Anya’s grandma comes, it’d be a shame to always be around herrrr,” he dragged out his sentence. Jim made a face that said ‘fair enough.’ 

“If you uh, want, you can, I-I guess,” Jim stumbled over his words as he shrugged. Dimitri patted his friend’s back. 

“Great, I’ll see you at dinner. Currently, I have a ton of paper work to do,” he sighed, frustrated, and began to head to his room. Jim watched every step until the older man disappeared behind the door. 

“I’m so happy to see you weirdos talking again,” the teen nearly jumped out of his skin. He snapped around and moaned. 

“Anya, really?! You scared the hell out of me!” 

The ginger laughed at her friend. “I’m sure I did. But seriously, I’m happy that you aren’t ignoring him anymore.” 

“That obvious?” She nodded. 

“It’s whatever now. You guys are becoming friends again!” She clapped cheerfully. Jim raised an eyebrow. 

“Why are you celebrating that?” He asked with a smug smile. They started to walk next to each other, slowly pacing the hall. Anya made a thinking face. 

“Because I think it’s important that my staff are getting along with my friend?” She guessed. Jim laughed. 

“Yeah, Jim Hawkins, Anastasia Romanov’s staff member, expert cook, degree comes from some fat guy who has a pirate accent,” he threw his hands up dramatically for effect. Anya threw her head back in laughter. 

“Mhmm,” she hummed lightly. A bubble of comfortable silence formed around the two after a while. It had been minutes since either of them had spoke. They paced the halls slowly, soaking in all the details that either of them hadn’t noticed before. Anya cocked her head at this painting after taking a long glance at it. 

“Why the heck is this guy wearing devil horns with a latex suit and why is this girl cutting this other girl’s dress to shreds?” The Russian lady asked. 

Jim appeared by her side and took a moment to take in the painting. “Maybe the guy is the devil tempting the lady to do that to the other one. And maybe, that guy in the corner is proposing to nothing because he’s in the light...” they sat there in silence once more. 

“HAHAHA!” They roared together in unison. 

“Nah, this painting is just stupid!” Jim shouted out as Anya’s laughs still echoed down the halls. 

The both of them continued like that for the rest of the silent venture. Somewhat silent. Jim’s head raced to one thing and another, clouding the boy’s head with uncertainty. 

‘Important that my staff are getting along with my friend,’ he thought. ‘Friend...’ the word bubbled in his mind. 

Friend. Anya referred to Dimitri as a friend. Anya saw Dimitri as a friend. 

Wait...

Friend.

ANYA SAW DIMITRI AS A FRIEND!

“Sorry, I just remembered I have to write a letter for Amelia and Doppler. She really doesn’t like it when people are late!” Jim sputtered  
out and rushed down the corridor. Anya yelled after him but didn’t chase.

“MAKE SURE YOU FILL ME IN ON ALL THOSE COOLS THINGS ABOUT AMELIA!” Jim threw a thumbs up and continued hastily. 

He slammed the door a little too loud for his taste but that left his mind as quickly as his next breath. He scrambled to the desk, stuttering a ‘Hi, Morph!’ out as the blob emerged from the bed. The teen snatched the scent bottle out of his pocket briskly. He glanced at the flask for a mere second before grabbing the paper, ink, and feathered pen. 

Once everything was set up, Jim sighed and leaned back, admiring his work so far. The off white parchment laid right in the direct center of his desk with the ink to the upper right and scent bottle to the upper left. Everything was more than ready. And so, the boy took a deep breath and reached for the pen. He dipped the feathered writing utensil elegantly and brought it over to the parchment. His hand floated above it, a slight shake sending the pen to the left and right softly. 

“Stop shaking,” he lectured his hand through gritted teeth. His hand of course, didn’t stop. 

PLOP! 

A black dot contrasted with the white criminally. Then another followed suite like the beginning of a rain storm. Jim shook his head furiously and put the pen away. He snatched the ruined paper and crumbled it in his hands before throwing it violently on the floor. Jim took a deeper but forced breath this time and reached for the feather again. The paper seemed to be emerging from its bonds of white, zig zagging every which way around Jim’s busy mind. A straight line here and a swirl that resembled a staircase there. 

More black dots followed in lead of its successor, each bigger than the last. 

“JUST WRITE, JIM!” He leaned forward in his chair swiftly and screeched at the wall. Morph flew away from his bed made of Jim’s failed pieces of paper and landed on the brunette’s shoulder. He chirped sadly. “I’m sorry, Morph. I just...I can’t write. I thought this was a good idea but I can’t think.” 

In the end, all Jim had on paper was;

‘I heard you liked poppies.’  
— mechtatel' lyubvi


	4. Showing You My World

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim adds onto his letter for his mother and asks her for advice. He sends it away with the help of his friend. All the meanwhile, Dimitri has a problem with Anya’s grandmother arriving at the palace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m finally getting to the plotttttt. Anyways, this entire fic name and chapter names are inspired after “My Kind Of Woman” lyrics by Mac deMarco. I don’t really know what else to say but over the weekend I’ll be posting a lot of chapters or as many as I can. oh! I forgot to mention this but Silver isn’t an alien in this fic. I made him human to expand on his and Jim’s relationship. You’ll see eventually.

Last night had hit the brunette like a train. He woke in his bed, covered in the bright sun that struck Jim’s eyes. The birds chirped quietly on the tree branch in front of the window. Morph slugged out from Jim’s jacket and sleepily settled on the teen’s cheek. 

“Morph...” he groaned softly. The creature chattered lazily. “Morph...you feel weird...” the blob didn’t move. “Morphhhh...” Jim moaned. The boy stopped pressing on and fell in and out of consciousness. A few seconds passed and Jim still went in and out. Suddenly, the birds flew away frantically and sounds of gallops on stone flooded the surrounding area. 

Jim bolted forward in his bed with wide eyes and hurriedly threw the blanket off of himself. He rushed to his dresser and put on the nicest thing he could find which was his uniform neither Anya or Dimitri had enforced on him. He shrugged off his tan shirt and a white, sharp, clean one took its place. Jim put the tie around his neck and put his hand to one side and the other. 

“Morph...” he called out while fidgeting with the piece of fabric. “How the heck do you tie a tie?” The blob shrugged with a smile, snaked himself around Jim’s neck and turned into a tie. The teen beamed at the action. “Thanks, buddy.” His tie chittered happily. Jim snatched his pants and struggled with getting his legs in. 

“Woah!” He shouted out as he fell straight on the floor. “Ow...” he groaned and boosted hastily up again, getting his legs right this time. The belt jingled as he stole it from its place on the desk chair. He wrapped it around his waist before grumbling. Jim turned the belt on its other side with it around his waist. He fastened the loop. 

The door slammed behind Jim as he scurried out the room. For once, the palace was full of maids and butlers spotted in every which hallway. The boy slowed down and stopped running. Dimitri’s room came into view and Jim instinctively walked towards it. The Russian man bursted out his chambers, panting while tying his tie, struggling as Jim did. Dimitri turned to face Jim and smiled brightly. 

“I see I’m not the only stressed one,” he let out a sigh with a smirk still playing at his lips. Jim reddened. 

“Yeah, it’s crazy. There’s actually people in the palace for once...” Dimitri nodded with a scoff. 

“Unfortunately,” he mumbled and began to walk with Jim trailed beside him. Jim cocked a brow, still flushed. 

“Unfortunately?”

“The uh, maids, they like to flirt a lot. It’s irritating to say the least. It’s always so awkward telling them you aren’t interested. Now, they just think Anya is my girlfriend, for some reason,” he informed. 

“Is she, though?” Jim slipped out. His eyes widened immediately and he slapped a hand over his mouth. “I am so sorry.” Dimitri chuckled. 

“No, no, it’s fine. She’s not my girlfriend. I basically see her as a sister,” the Russian ensured. Jim sighed with relief internally. So it was official, both sides confirmed it; they weren’t dating and didn’t see each other like that. Jim still burned up a bit more though, full of embarrassment and glee. If only the boy could actually write then maybe his plan would be perfect. But, he still wasn’t sure what his plan was. All he really thought of was writing anonymously but, what’s after that? Jim wasn’t sure and he was scared to find out. 

Jim shook his head softly and turned to Dimitri, still red. The taller man looked at Jim with a weird expression he couldn’t place. 

“God, you’re so cute..” he barely whispered. All the brunette heard was cute.

“Cute?” He asked. “What’s cute?” His tie erupted in chirps. Jim laughed out loud. “Yeah, Morph, you’re cute,” the tie chattered with satisfaction. Dimitri’s face flooded with blood and looked away. 

“Yeah,” he verified. “Morph is pretty cute...”

Jim giggled. 

The two bursted through the doors. Dimitri squinted for a second at the snow while Jim covered his eyes and groaned. The snow was soft looking and white as heaven. The cold pinched at their noses making a great excuse as to why both men were red as roses. 

Anya brightened at the sight of her friends and scurried over in her heels. She wore a simple purple flapper dress and Jim wondered if she was cold at all. 

“Are you...cold at all?” He asked. Anya laughed and shook her head. 

“Do you have any idea at how warm it is today? It’s not everyday you get this great of weather in Russia!” She exclaimed. “You have got to meet my grandmother! She’ll love you!” She pulled her friend by his hands and dragged him over towards the carriage. Dimitri hesitated before ultimately following the duo. 

The driver jumped down from his seat and headed towards the door, opening it royally. Out came an old lady with a blue flapper dress and a simple tiara. Her heels tapped against the stone deafeningly. It was like she was matching with Anya.

The Russian lady smiled ear to ear and headed towards her grandmother. They hugged closely and exchanged ‘hi,’ and ‘how are you’s.’ Anya pulled away and led the polite lady to her friends. The Empress’ smile dropped immediately. 

“Hello, Dimitri,” she said nonchalantly. Dimitri swallowed hard but kept his cool. 

“Hello, ma’am.”

Jim glanced at his friend with worry. Dimitri glanced back with a truck full of anxiety. He gave a half assed smirk and turned back towards the ladies. 

The Empress looked at Jim and her smile returned just as bright as before. 

“Hello, young man,” she greeted. Jim showed his teeth as an attempt of a smile. The woman laughed heartily. “Don’t be scared of me, I don’t bite.” Dimitri rolled his eyes and groaned under his breath. Jim nodded. 

“Yeah, I’m sure you don’t.” The teen said. “Ma’am,” he added at the last minute. 

“Ooh!” Anya popped in. “This is my friend, Jim Hawkins! He’s also our cook and he’s soooo gooddd grandma you have got to try his cooking,” she emphasized. The brunette twinkled genuinely at his friend’s excitement. 

The Empress nodded, still beaming and faced the doors. Dimitri sighed and composed himself again. They began to head into the building once more. 

———

The kitchen was no longer Jim’s. He watched as maids and butlers came bursting in, taking plates and more plates of food outside towards the ball room. And, he watched as other cooks stole his success and title of making fantastic and unique meals. It was all bland and predictable. Beef stew here and borscht there. Really, borscht? There’s gotta be more to Russian food other than borscht. Apparently, the Empress had decided to throw a full on party or ball, whatever you want to call it. Classical music, fancy dresses, over expensive cuisines and all. 

Dimitri tracked each move in the kitchen calmly, a cigarette hanging from his mouth. It wasn’t lit, however. Jim finished up a plate of his own and put it on the table for the butlers to grab and serve. The teen sighed through his nose deeply once he returned to his station. Dimitri watched with amusement. 

“I think I know what you mean by ‘never taking no for an answer,’” he shouted softly over the havoc. 

“You haven’t seen anything at all, красотка,” he shouted back. Jim cocked a brow at the unfamiliar word and shrugged, returning to his work. He snatched an order from the ticket holder and groaned. “What is it?” Dimitri jumped down from the counter and looked over the shorter man’s shoulder. 

“A special order...” Jim moaned. The Russian patted the boy on the shoulder. 

“You’ll live.” 

“I won’t if I accidentally fuck up one little detail! Royal people are snobs, remember? Especially when they want special food!” He screamed. Dimitri laughed huskily. 

“I’m always here if you need help,” he reminded. 

“Great, do you know how to make pelmeni and khrenovina sauce but like specially made?” Jim asked eagerly. Dimitri smirked widely. 

“Of course I do, I’m Russian.” 

“Awesome,” Jim shoved the order on the man’s chest, “get cooking.” Dimitri grabbed the appropriate pots and pans, stopping to light his cigarette and to take a puff when the cookware was on the stove. Jim smiled and began his own work. Maybe, Dimitri could really be a big help. This was a win to Jim, in a way. He was connecting with his childhood friend again but that only meant his feelings would deepen. Jim was scared shitless of the eventual time. The failed letter popped in his brain as he stirred a sauce. Was he still going to send the letters? 

“Mom would know...” he mumbled. Dimitri didn’t catch what he said, probably because of the craze in the kitchen. Jim was thankful for the mess, but only this one time. 

———

The craze never ended in the kitchen but it did for Jim and Dimitri, but only for an hour. They sat outside, breathing in the much needed cold air. Dimitri was probably on what Jim guessed as his 5th cigarette. Jim rolled his eyes and held his breath briefly at the feeling of the smoke puncturing his lungs. He let the breath out once he was closer to the other man, adjusted enough. 

“Those things are rolled up cancer,” he complained as he sat down next to the Russian. The older man smirked wickedly. 

“Worried about me, Jimmy?” 

The brunette erupted in blushes and began to stutter out a response. Dimitri roared huskily at his friend. “I’m only kidding, Jim. But yeah, rolled up cancer. That’s the point.” 

“I thought the point was the nicotine?” He barely cooled off but watched as Dimitri blew the smog out his mouth. The smoke travelled though the currents of the breezy air and Dimitri nodded. 

“That too. I just personally like getting a taste of normal,” he replied as he studied the bud lazily, turning it between his fingers. 

“Huh, I guess that makes sense.” 

Silence engulfed the men as they observed the night sky and its infinite amount of sparkly stars. Jim’s face twisted into embarrassment. 

“I’m sorry if this is too personal but-“ 

“What happened to my parents?” Dimitri asked nonchalantly, still studying his cigarette. 

“I was going to ask why your parents were never around when we were kids but yeah, I guess that’s the same question...” Jim trailed off awkwardly. Dimitri turned to his friend with grief subtly written over his face. 

“It’s fine, Jim. Everyone asks, I’m used to it.” 

“It’s still a personal matter. I don’t enjoy getting used to being asked a personal question all the time.” 

Dimitri exhaled and rolled over on his side, propping himself up with his elbow, which he laid his chin on. “They died of disease when I was 8. That’s it, really. Then I found work in the palace and became close enough to Anya to be considered a family member. At least to Anya’s parents. Never to her grandmother. Probably because I was a peasant, and still kind of am,” he explained. Jim nodded, understanding every word. 

“But, you were only a kid. How is it your fault you were poor? And alone...” he trailed off the last part. Dimitri simply shrugged, returning his view to the stars. 

“I’m not sure.”

“Is that the real reason why you really don’t like her? Anya’s grandmother?” 

“Yeah, but the other stuff I said is also my reasoning. She’s just annoying and lacks sympathy for people different than her. Monarchy at its finest,” he grumbled lowly and flicked the bud away. The cigarette turned into a soggy mess in the puddle of water that laid below the men. “What about your dad? You always seem to refer to Silver as your ‘father figure’” he threw up air quotes. 

“Oh, my dad left when I was a kid. He just left like that,” Jim snapped his fingers. “Just took his ship and blasted away with no regret or hesitation. His absence led to me and my mom’s poverty. That’s why I was working in the kitchen at the age I was.” 

Dimitri nodded. “But, why would you choose Silver out of all people? Wouldn’t that make your experience worse?” He asked awkwardly. Jim nodded with a shrug. 

“Yeah, it did make my life here worse. I guess the only time royals care about peasants is when they interact with black people,” he said. “But, he was kind of like a person I could latch onto. He perfectly understood my life because he lived it as well. Poor and stuck. He barely landed that job, y’know? He always talked about how lucky he was to get a job at all, especially one that wasn’t as a garbage boy.

“We could relate so much and he just wanted to care and protect me and I wanted him to to be my father I never really had. It was a perfect match, perfect click. Y’know?” He turned back to Dimitri only to be faced with a gloomy expression. 

“Yeah...” the man sighed. 

“Don’t look at me like that. We both had horrible lives,” Jim’s voice cracked as tears pooled at his eyes. Dimitri looked up at the teen and sat up properly. He lifted his hand and wiped away the brunette’s tears, his grip fragile. More came as Jim closed his eyes, deep crimson at the face. This was it. This was the shatter of Jim and his sanity. He feared the time of when he would fall so hard for Dimitri without even knowing that that time was only hours away. 

He shedded more tears. Not because of his father or because of his and Silver’s life, but because Jim was stuck and incredibly in love.  
Jim was incredibly and wickedly in love with Dimitri Sudayev. 

———

‘Dear, mother, I’m so confused and stuck and scared. I’ve fallen hard, real hard for this person. They just strike my heart with Cupid’s arrows every time I talk or even see them. It’s overbearing yet addicting. It’s driving me insane. A few hours ago at what I guess, 10 o’clock, we had a talk during my break. Anastasia’s grandmother has come to visit and she threw a party. It’s currently still going on but I’m off duty, luckily. My arms are sore from cooking. That’s beside the point but, we talked. We had a heart to heart. They talked about their life and how their parents died and I told them about dad and Silver. It just flooded out. I couldn’t help it, they make me weak. I’m scared, I’m so, so, incredibly scared to lose them because of my feelings. 

Mother, they are a man. I’m afraid to lose my childhood friend because of love.’ 

The ink bleed through the paper as Jim finished the last sentence and the last series of loops of his last word. A tear plopped onto the paper. Jim choked out a sob, sniffled roughly and, rubbed his left eye violently. He put away the pen and hugged his legs tightly in his chair. He laid his forehead on his knees and zoned everything out. The light chatter from outside didn’t exist to Jim anymore and the rapid steps of running didn’t faze him. However, the loud series of bangs on his door did.

He snapped out of his fetal position and wiped his eyes. “No, no, no, no! I’m uh, I’m getting dressed!” He shouted out an excuse. 

“Jim, please! It’s me, Anya! Please, open the door!” She begged from the other side. No, Anya can’t see him like this. Maybe he could blame it on the stress. No! He can’t do that, Anya probably already knows Jim isn’t the type of guy to cry because of stress. Oh god! 

“No, Anya. I’m uh, getting ready for a shower?” 

“Jim, please stop lying. I know you’re crying, please just let me help!” She cried out. Jim sighed. There was no use. He slugged to his door and opened it quietly, peaking his head out. Anya’s face soften at the sight of her friend. She gestured with her hand gently. Jim made an ‘o’ with his mouth and let her in. He could practically feel his hot and red nose. He sniffled once more. The ginger lady walked in and attacked her friend in a tight and long hug. Jim nudged the door lightly, watching it close. 

He hugged back with just as much vigor and spilled again. The tears rushed out like a violent waterfall and soaked the poor woman’s bare shoulder. Her pearls stuck themselves to his collarbones uncomfortably but Jim didn’t care. His eyes were closed as he dreamt that it was his mother he was hugging. He tightened his grip subtly. 

They pulled back and faced each other, Anya also crying. Jim smiled pathetically. 

“Why are you crying?” He croaked out. 

“Because you’re my friend and I love you,” she replied. Jim choked and blinked out more tears. 

He closed his eyes with tears starting a soft pump in his head. “Oh god, that’s so n-nice...to hear,” he whispered, voice cracking. Anya smiled softly and pulled the brunette in again. They walked over to the bed and sat down, feeling the bed sink down at their weight. 

“What happened?” She asked softly. Jim shook his head, face still pressed against her chest. 

“I don’t think I can tell anyone...” silence flared the room up. 

“Does it have to do with Dimitri...?” Anya murmured so quiet that Jim wasn’t even sure if Anya said what he thought. But, he knew what she said. She knew all along and Jim knew that. He knew it like the back of his hand but he still sobbed when she asked. He nodded. 

“Y-y-“ 

“Shhh,” she interrupted, “take your time. It’s okay.” 

“I-I’m so in love with...h..” he didn’t finish his sentence as he sighed deeply in frustration. He needed to get it out. Anya already knew and she didn’t care. She still loved him and saw him as a friend. She didn’t fire him or disown him. She opened her arms up so much just for Jim, he couldn’t believe it. She reminded him so much of his mother and even Silver a little bit. Anya was exactly what he needed. 

“I’m so...I’m so in love with him that i-it hurts...” he sobbed out. 

“Shh, it’s okay. Everything is fine,” she mumbled as she rocked the both of them back and forth gently. It felt like what Jim pictured of waves rocking against a boat on a calm day at sea. This was what he needed. 

———

Dimitri entered the ball room with a gentle and relaxed expression. A small trio of ladies passed the man, giggling as they walked by. He winked at them smoothly, hearing their loud squeals as he walked away, heading directly for the Empress. She eyed him and he made his way up the stairs and to her side, right where he was supposed to be. 

“Where’s my granddaughter?” She asked strictly. 

“I thought you’d know,” he hissed back while presenting like a perfect man. His back was agonizingly straight and his chin so high up, he began to feel like a narcissist. The old lady glared daggers at the taller man and turned back towards the crowd of people dancing elegantly. People lined up on the sides of the room, chatting and laughing. It would be a small dose of normal for Dimitri if they weren’t dressed so expensively that it made Dimitri want to gag. Where was Jim when you needed him? 

Jim. 

Where is Jim? 

“Where were you anyways?” The Empress returned to the previous conversation. 

“It doesn’t matter. I don’t need your judgment or approval,” Dimitri replied with a tone laced with hate and spite. The Russian woman smirked hatefully. 

“You were with that boy, weren’t you?” She asked with fake curiosity. She already knew the answer, both of them knew. 

“What does it matter to you?”

“I just don’t like to see you around peasants. Especially not people like him,” she said viscously, getting slightly in the man’s face. They still had an act to play and that presented as bonds. If they were in private, Dimitri would be scared out of his skin but he had protection. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He snarled. 

“Oh nothing, I just really didn’t want you to fall from your future status of ‘royalty’ or even ‘Tsar of Russia.’” The white haired lady said with amusement. 

“I told you no,” Dimitri replied sternly. “You stupid, arrogant, and stubborn woman. It’s never going to happen.” 

“It’s going to happen,” she snapped. “I said so.” 

“And I said no!” He shouted out. People near by snapped their gaze to the duo. Dimitri looked around and glared at them. “What are you looking at? Get back to drinking your stupid cocktails!” He growled and stormed away. The Empress watched with a savage smile wide on her face. 

———

Jim stomped in the snow with Anya right beside him. He was still full of sadness but it wasn’t ready to come out. Jim thanked the Lord for that, he wasn’t sure his head could take anymore crying. Anya still talked with Jim like nothing and happened and it was nice. She didn’t judge him, she didn’t make it a big deal at all. That was important. Finally, a mail box appeared in the distance and Jim huffed out a sigh.

“Thank the Lord,” he mumbled as they got closer. Anya laughed softly. 

“Cold?” Jim nodded and stuffed the letter in eagerly. 

“Yeah. Now, I’m going to torture myself with impatience. Hope the letter gets to her soon,” he replied. The ginger nodded with a shrug and turned around. They began to trail back to the palace which was still booming with guests and music. 

“She’ll be happy to hear from you. I’m sure she’s feeling just the same amount of impatience as you,” Anya reassured.

“Yeah,” Jim mumbled, “she better feel like that. Tonight has been a hell of a night.”


	5. I'm Feeling So Tired, Really Falling Apart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim painfully remembers his past. Sarah worries for her son once she gets his letter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so uhhhh I didn’t think I had enough reasoning as to why Jim loved Dimitri so this chapter is gonna start with some flashbacks/dreams, it’s also going to be a bit short because I can’t think rn and I’m not happy with I originally wrote. hope u still enjoy <3

The sheet was a great and royal cream. Jim’s hands clutched them softly as he felt ghost touches exploring his body. The touch outlined his collar bones and neck bone. It softly rubbed a shoulder muscle briefly and returned to his chest, sliding past a nipple and advancing to the teen’s v-line. Jim moaned softly at the agonizingly slow feel and opened his mouth to speak but he was interrupted. 

“Shhh,” the voice whispered, putting a finger over Jim’s mouth. The brunette felt a hand grip his chin like he was a fragile piece of china. His head was lifted up slowly as the person’s thumb traced Jim’s bottom lip affectionately. His eyes widened as he was met with chocolate orbs. 

“Dimitri...” he gasped. The Russian smiled lovingly and nodded. Jim’s face was painted in confusion. He began to look around with his eyes and immediately realized where he was. He was in Dimitri’s room. The walls were a deep emerald with gold patterns and white crown moulding. A painting hung right in front of the bed. It was of a young Russian Tsar with a man beside him. The Tsar had brown hair with a middle part and a fancy crown on his head and an elegant uniform with gold stitching and many medals. The man next to him was also a brunette with a ponytail and shaved hair. The young man also wore a uniform with not as many medals. The uniform was black and the stitching was an easy silver. Jim’s eyes widened as he realized who the people were.

He turned back to Dimitri and saw that the man’s expression didn’t waver. The brunette gulped silently and leaned in, Dimitri following. They connected deeply with Jim moaning into the kiss. Dimitri’s hands travelled up Jim’s back and gripped roughly, pulling him in even closer. The teen tilted his head as his own move and snaked around the Russian’s body. They pulled back to breath and Jim immediately got to work on Dimitri’s shirt. He threw it across the room and looked down to see he was already shirtless. 

Dimitri was well lean and athletically built. Jim gaped at the man and traced his abs and pecs gingerly, savoring every moment. 

Jim didn’t keep track as everything was a blur. He swore only minutes ago he and Dimitri were still kissing passionately but now, Jim had his face in a pillow and his ass high in the air. Slaps and pounds and grunts from Dimitri echoed through the empty room and Jim wondered who could hear them as his head clouded in euphoria. The Russian was big, real big. And, so much so that Jim wasn’t even sure if Dimitri could even fit his whole length in. 

Dimitri kept hitting that one spot over and over from different positions. He was skilled, and Jim couldn’t stand it. Eventually, the older man turned the brunette on his back and started to kiss everywhere tenderly, still thrusting. He couldn’t take it, bare it, whatever. 

“I-“ Jim choked out. Dimitri pulled away and made intimidating eye contact. 

“Я тебя люблю,” he growled out.

The scene had shifted to a fancy ballroom. Outside the grand windows, it was dark and snowing heavily. Jim was spun around causing him to snap his attention back to his state. The hand that held his was gloved and warm; the hand squeezed his. The brunette looked up and was met with Dimitri again. He was smiling and had the exact same outfit on from the painting. The teen swooned lovingly and smiled back just as fondly and glanced down, realizing he also had the same outfit on from the painting. The music rang throughout the ballroom and directly into his ears. The music made his heart tingle with nostalgia and lyrics seemed to echo in his brain. It was like...he knew this song by heart. 

Dancing Bears

Jim was spun around once more.

Painted Wings

The people around him evaporated like they were ghosts and the bright candles that illuminated the room were blown out suddenly. Jim could still feel Dimitri dancing against him, showing no sign of confusion. 

Things I almost remember.

Dimitri began to slowly evaporate like the rest of the people. He leaned in with his face right next to Jim’s ear and whispered,

“Я тебя люблю.”

The word echoed and now Jim was alone in the black abyss.

And a song someone sings

Something glowed in the black criminally. Jim walked towards the orange and yellow glow, processing the image in as it focused the closer he got. It was Anya, young Anya. She was holding her hand in other one, sobbing to herself. Jim got as close as he could and saw that she had a slash on her hand. He looked around the vision to see that they were in her room. The image swallowed Jim up and now he had a 360 view. He gaped at the action but still looked around the extravagant room. Next to Anya was a fountain pen with the tip covered in blood. 

Suddenly, someone came into the room and ran towards the ginger child frantically. The woman was the Empress. She hasn’t changed very much other than her outfit for she was in a baby blue nightgown. Anya looked up at her grandmother, tears still pouring down her face.

“I’m sorry, babushka,” she sobbed out. “You told me not to mess with your fountain pen but it was so pretty!” 

Jim glanced back at the pen with a face squished in pity. It was true, the pen was pretty. It was a deep, royal blue and had gold patterns and loops painted all around the object. He could understand why Anya would touch it, he would’ve himself. 

The older woman sighed. 

“Apology accepted. Now, let’s go clean up, yeah?” 

Anya nodded and the pair stood up and walked out the door, not even acknowledging Jim. He watched every step until he couldn’t see them no more. 

While they were out of his vision, he still heard Anya say something as they advanced away.

“Я люблю тебя, бабушка.”

His view morphed again, showcasing the familiar palace hallways. Two boys ran out from the corner, playing a game of tag. The boys were Jim and Dimitri. The brunette smiled earnestly at the memory. He had remembered this moment with all his heart. Dimitri was the tagger and Jim was the hunted. Both children giggled and shouted back nonsense as the game continued. 

The little boys turned another corner and Jim ran after them frantically, laughing himself. Dimitri advanced towards his friend and tackled him. Little Jim cackled and began to wrestle back. 

“Get off of me, you jerk!” little Jim screamed playfully. 

“Nu-uh! I won fair and square! You can’t resist victory!” Tiny Dimitri shouted out the saying. Jim recognized it immediately. It was the thing Captain Nathanial Flint had said once when he raided an entire planet and got control. Why little Dimitri was quoting a guy like that, Jim still didn’t know. 

“Captain NF sucks!” The boy abbreviated. Dimitri cackled some more. 

“Okay, loser! Pretty sure all the ‘good guys’ lost and got their butts kicked!” 

“No way!” Jim got up from his friend’s grip and denied what the other boy had said. “No way! That’s not true!” 

“Yeah it is!” The Russian boy got up and stood in front of Jim. “That’s how Captain Nathanial Flint made Treasure Planet and you know what?!” He asked. 

“We’re gonna find it together!” They roared in unison and giggled. Their laughs were short lived, however. Sarah and Silver turned the corner and watched the boys with pity. Jim realized their presence and beamed, running towards them with Dimitri trailing along. 

“Mom! What are you doing here!?” He giggled some more as his friend called him dummy playfully. 

“Oh, Jim....” Sarah wiped away a tear. The real Jim watched with wide eyes, knowing exactly what was coming next. “Me and Silver...Silver and I,” she corrected nervously. “We’ve um, we-“ her sentence was cut off by Silver placing a hand on the woman’s shoulder softly. She turned to the African American. Silver shook his head and she nodded swiftly and stepped back. 

“Son...” he started. Little Jim raised a brow and shared a confused look with Dimitri. They shrugged and looked back. “We decided that it’s best ye do no work. Ye got an education to learn a life all ahead of ye!” He spoke with a bit of heat and passion. “Ye need to go somewhere else Jimbo...”

Little Jim’s face was ridden with confusion along with his friend’s. The real Jim blinked out a tear. “That means, ye ain’t going to see lil’ Dimitri anymore,” Silver sighed out. 

Baby Jim’s face was washed over with pain. “No,” he mumbled out, feeling Dimitri put a hand on his shoulder. “No!” He realized. “No! No! You can’t do that! He’s my best friend!” 

“Yeah!” Dimitri sobbed out, realizing as well. “You can’t do that to us!” They clung together, crying while facing the adults. Sarah buried her face in Silver’s shoulder, her chest heaving up and down. “No!” 

Jim sobbed quietly at the scene. But, just like the rest, it to disappeared with the last words coming from Dimitri. He whispered them in Jim’s ears as they hugged each other tightly. 

“Я тебя люблю,” Dimitri said, Jim murmured the saying to himself. That was the last thing Dimitri had said to Jim before they reunited. 

Once upon a December.

—

Jim shot directly up in his bed, panting heavily. Tear trails itched his skin and he instinctively sniffled. He wiped at his eyes with his forearm with tears still taking the place of the last. Morph jumped out of his bed and advanced towards the teen worriedly. 

“What the fuck?” he whispered to himself, ignoring the creature unintentionally.

———

Sarah sat in her kitchen chair sobbing with a letter clutched tightly in her hand. Her sobs pathetically echoed through the dark kitchen. A light lit ablaze in the room making Sarah snap her attention towards it. 

“Lass....” Silver mumbled sadly. “What’s wrong?” Sarah’s face melted into more anguish upon hearing the words from her boyfriend. 

“I was...I-I was so ex-excited to hear from..Jimmy! But!” She pointed to the letter sadly. “He’s so s-sad and he’s hurting!” She shouted out and bawled some more. Silver swiftly walked to the other chair and sat down, scooting it in front of Sarah. He grabbed her hands tenderly and rubbed a thumb on them. 

“I-I can’t do anything...I sent him out to help with the stupid m-money and he just gets h-hurt!” 

“Let me read the letter from Jimbo,” Silver demanded softly. Sarah nodded vigorously and pulled her hands away from his grip, shoving the paper towards the African American. She put her head back into her folded arms and weeped harder, sniffling in roughly. Silver’s eyes quickly analyzed the text, his face getting gloomier and gloomier as he read each sentence. 

“Oh,” he blurted out, completely dumbfounded. “I-“

“What?” Sarah demanded with her face still in her arms. “Do you think it’s weird he loves a man!?” She screamed out grievously. Silver shook his head violently at the accusation. 

“No!” He proposed. “It’s just...Jimbo is never all torn up about love. This man...he must be real special.” 

“Special?! My Jimmy is hurt because of him!” She said crassly. 

The African shook his head and grabbed her hands once more. “This isn’t ye, Sarah. Ye need sleep. The lad will ask us for help when he needs it. If he really loves this man, he’ll do everything he can to get him. He will be fine unless said so...” 

Sarah looked at her boyfriend, astonished.

“Let’s sleep...please.”


	6. As Long As You’re Next To Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim finally sends his first letter and Dimitri receives it with a strange delight. Maria continues to be annoyed by Dimitri and his stubbornness. Anya stays ‘oblivious’ to her grandmother’s planning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am so sorry for not uploading sooner! i got unmotivated and i couldn’t even write a few sentences to this chapter. it’s taken about five attempts but I’ve done it. hope u enjoy as always even if it is a bit short <3

‘Dear Dimitri, you’re so hypnotizing to me. Your smooth and cocky attitude draws me in, leaving me waiting for you to say something witty again that makes me laugh heartily. I swear, if you ever get rid of your middle part, i will cry and come to your house and fix your hair. Please, it’s an amazing hair style. Anyways, I guess I’m getting off topic. You know, I heard you liked poppies. Don’t ask where, but, I like poppies too. It’s such a simple but nice flower. I’d like to see you in a field of them. Maybe, we could make each other flower crowns, have a picnic. Whatever you’d like. It’s all up to you. 

For I am just indefinitely in love with you and your wish is my command. 

All yours, mechtatel' lyubvi.’ 

And right below his signature, he wrote the words in Russian delicately, hoping he wouldn’t mess up so he wouldn’t have to restart the entire letter. He pulled away, satisfied, studying his series of loops and hardness of the ink. 

‘мечтатель любви.’ 

“Don’t look at it again, Jim,” he mumbled sternly to himself as he wrapped up the letter, knowing the ink was already dry. He reached to the side and grabbed a red ribbon, tying it around the parchment carefully and professionally. Jim pulled away once more to savor his work. He sighed deeply, proud just enough.

“How am I supposed to deliver this, Morph?” He asked aloud, watching as the pink blob flew to his side, chirping with confusion. “Yeah,” he nodded, “I don’t know either.” 

———

Dimitri dragged his feet on the floor as he headed towards the dining room. It was morning already. Little too early for the Russian’s taste but he knew with Maria being here, she would probably complain at him for sleeping in. She would call him unprofessional and not fit for royalty. The irony made him smile lazily to himself as he thought. He pushed the grand red doors open and entered, seeing that Maria was already seated, eating her sausage completely unbothered. Dimitri rolled his eyes as he moved away from her view. 

He grabbed a plate while feeling the older lady’s eyes on him. He groaned softly to himself at her action and stabbed a sausage forcefully. He turned on his heel and sat down in front of the Empress, immediately putting on a faux attitude. 

“Hello, Empress,” he greeted. Maria looked away from her book and glared up at him. He smirked at her frustration, deciding to continue on. “How’s your amazingly royal day been going?” He said while holding back light chuckles because of how cheesy he sounded.

Maria rubbed her nose and slapped her book closed, sliding it forward on the table. She put her hands together and looked up at Dimitri once more, waiting for him to continue. 

“Well? How is it?” 

“Fine...until you came. The breakfast is quite nice, thanks to Jim. Be a pity if you let his work get cold,” she snapped. Dimitri glanced at his breakfast. He had to admit, the sausage, sryniki, and heavily seasoned eggs did seem tasty. He returned to Maria and shrugged. 

“He’ll understand that knowing how the Empress is doing is a lot more important than breakfast I can certainly have later. Now, what’s that book about?” He pointed towards the object with amusement. Maria sighed.

“It’s about cutting up little Russian boys that are brown haired with middle parts and cocky, annoying, attitudes,” the lady spat out viciously. 

“Huh,” Dimitri deadpanned. “Doesn’t sound too interesting to me, but I guess that’s because I have taste. You ever read ‘The Twelve Chairs?’” He emphasized the title dramatically, smiling down at Maria, waiting for an answer. 

“Never had a thing for satirical books,” she replied coldly. 

“A shame. I mean, I already knew that but seriously, you haven’t read The Twelve Chairs? A shame, like I said. Real funnnyyy,” the Russian man dragged out. 

“Get to the point, Dimitri.”

“I’m not marrying your daughter,” the words slipped out easily without him even meaning to. But, he didn’t look back on this mistake. He just didn’t want to give Maria the satisfaction. 

“And why is that so?” She stood up in her chair, attempting to over top the obviously taller man. He snorted at her and stood up himself, towering over her like she had intended to do. The Russian Empress backed away slightly, waiting.

“Because, if you love your granddaughter, you wouldn’t try to sell her off to a loveless marriage. Let her choose who she wants, not force it. I have no intention of becoming royalty. All I want is her to be my friend, like she is, and you,” he pointed a finger at the lady, “are ruining our friendship.”

“Please,” she tried to swap his finger away, having no luck, “I’m not ruining your friendship with her. I’m enhancing it! She loves you, Dimitri! Has since you were a kitchen boy here! She always talked about how cute you were, how fast you could run, how impressive you impersonate people! How silly and funny you were! She loves you! And you are breaking my granddaughter’s heart!” Maria accused hatefully. 

“Oh yeah! Well let her know that I’m not interested! Oh, and let her know that you plan on selling her off into a marriage! All to continue the throne! Can’t she be a lone queen until she finds the one? I’m not the one! I’m just Dimitri!” 

“You are! I want my Anastasia happy!” 

“Your Anastasia isn’t gonna be happy when she realizes I ain’t!” 

“You have to marry her!” She screamed spitefully. 

“ABSOLUTELY NOT!”

Maria backed away a few steps at Dimitri’s volume. He sighed as his face soften. 

“Sorry, but I’m not going to marry her. I said no, I mean no. Don’t be shocked that you aren’t getting your way. You said it yourself once, I’m a stupid and stubborn man. But you, Maria, you are even stupider.” Dimitri finished off with a snarl and stormed out the room, ignoring the loud slams from the doors as they shut closed. 

Anya’s eyes widened as she stepped back, bolting down the hallway before the man could see her. She ran as tears flew behind her, and she ran as her heart broke even more, step by step. 

———

Jim walked around the corner, seeing a butler in sight. He smirked wickedly and approached the fat man, wiping the smile off his face as he was in the man’s view. 

“Oh, hello!” The man greeted cheerfully. Jim smiled and put out a hand full of his letter. 

“When’s the last time Mr. Sudayev has gotten fan mail?” The brunette challenged lightly. The butler snorted with a hearty laugh. 

“Let me guess, maybe 2 days ago the latest,” the butler said. “Why? You have something for me to deliver?” 

Jim nodded mischievously. The employee laughed once more and grabbed the paper from the teen’s hand. He nodded.

“Why thank you. This one, oh!” He exclaimed. “Why, it smells like poppies! How fancy of this fan! I’ve never seen—or, I should say, smelled—anything like it! Oh, sir, you scored. Mr. Sudayev will love this one. More love, more money!” He trailed off while listening to Jim genuinely roar with amusement. Oh, so that’s why everyone likes to work here. 

He watched the man turn the corner and bolted back to his room. He closed the door loudly once Morph was in successfully, slid down the door, and panted like a dog. He turned to his pet and beamed. 

“I did it!” Jim exclaimed happily. “I did it! Oh god, I did it! He’s going to read it! Oh no, what if he knows it’s me,” his face melted into anxiety. Morph shook his head confidently. Jim breathed out, relaxing at his friend’s reassurance.

“Yeah, you’re right. I’ll be fine...I hope.”

——— 

Dimitri entered his room slowly, sighing immediately as he shut his cream colored door. He headed towards his desk (it was a habit) and sat down loudly. He studied his desk, specifically the note with a red ribbon that lay in front of him. 

“Why not?” Dimitri asked aloud and snatched up the letter, immediately getting a whiff of poppies. His eyes widened. “Oh, that’s...quite nice,” he commented and pulled the ribbon off lightly. He scanned the letter with patience, no intent on stopping. The smell just kept him there, the letter said so itself, he liked poppies!

He smiled fully at the words from this ‘mechtatel' lyubvi.’ He read the words over and over again. It was a change from the usual insults of being stubborn and stupid from Maria. 

“Should I write back? That would be rude if I didn’t...they did scent it. I haven’t ever received a scented letter in my whole life! I usually don’t reply, it’s best. But...they need to know that I’ll never cut my hair! Do they? No, Dimitri, they don’t. Yes they do! The people need to know,” he thought aloud and snatched his ink and parchment. He began to scribble away quickly.

“The people need to know?”


End file.
